Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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