If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
