Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
You ever have a fart follow you around?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
