I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
