and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
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