): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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