honey bunches of taint.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize