accomplished twins. life is a go
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize