His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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