check it out our google latitudes are spooning
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
