The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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