So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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