Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
