It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
