Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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