Don't make out with my wife yet
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
When did angry sex become our thing?
I have feelings that need drinking.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
