i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize