I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
