I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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