i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
