I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
