Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
