He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
