Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
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