you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
