I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
