She is in my trunk
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
