What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
