Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
