Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
