If i come over, it means nothing
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
