Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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