Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Randomize
