i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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