i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
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