I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
