so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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