were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
