So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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