She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Boobs are out for the taking
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
