Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize