I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
His nipple licking is glorious
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