i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
