i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
