She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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