You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
