so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
