I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
