I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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