I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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