The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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