But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Found your dick twin last night
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Randomize
